Red

The sky touched the field as though it longed to be one with it. I hadn't come across such a view before and it was breath taking. I longed for your arms around me and to hear your voice again, I knew I was being naive. You were nothing but a distant memory now and the past can never become the present.

Life has taken me on such a different path and you on such a different one. The hands of time only know why, where and when. As I write this I know you are somewhere crouched over a dusty desk tapping away at your laptops keys hoping your dead end job will get you noticed. Perhaps even a promotion would come your way? Its been five years and it still hasn't. Perhaps the time to re-evaluate your life is now?

I wanted you so badly it hurt but you were never right for me. I was the career focused overly obsessed workaholic who did a 360 and never wanted to step in an office again. You never seemed ambitious but you were secretly, deep inside. No one was going to look inside you and offer you the promotion on a plate were they? I feel I am still bitter towards you! Where is my forgiving side? I am not even sure if I have one anymore.

I was always the one encouraging you to do better and to believe in yourself. I didn't want you to doubt your potential. Potential time has sadly revealed that only I could see. Then,  you pushed me aside with reasons only known to yourself and the grapevine was set a light. A certain blonde bombshell had been seen visiting your place a few times a week! Coincidence perhaps? I think not. The timing could not be more shameless.

As I look around me and take in this stunning display of vast red fields and heart shaped trees. My longing and aching for you is turning into something much deeper and bitter. I didn't realise it but my heart still bleeds.