Nights
Nights of waking at the slightest sound and listening to your breathing. Worrying if you're warm enough or too hot under your duvet. Watching your face for expression changes and checking your hands and feet to be sure you're comfortable. Timed feed times and worrying about your weight -I am always on the clock.
Bottle sterilising and washing clothes -worried about the dust in the room and how the vacuum must be done. Sleep deprived and on my feet and for most days forgetting to eat. Feeling guilty for not eating properly because my baby needs my energy.
Feeling the pressure and listening to endless advice from all sources around me. Constantly feeling slightly guilty if you haven't eaten properly or when we have taken you out- you my perfect baby have slept right through your feed time.
I see you in my dreams and wonder how you do, even if your not in the same room I miss you. Wanting to be more organised and feeling the pressure of running time. You grow with each day and I want to cherish every month. Every smile, sneeze or cat like baby whimper. I want you to be safe and pray for you endlessly. I stress about the smallest things and the biggest. I worry about your future and then feel like have wasted the present.
You have been part of my life just over a month and now I can't remember a life without you. You are my perfect gift from Allah. You are the one I was waiting for. I stress and at the same time enjoy your reliance on me -the complete and utter calm I feel with you in my arms. The way you quieten down when I am near or how you look at me with longing eyes and how your world's safety stems from your parents.
How Thankful I am to my all mighty Allah for this blessing of you. Please my Allah give me the strength , the calm and the rapidness of thought to be able to raise a child that will be a asset to our world and an example of a wonderful human being, kind ,considerate and caring while world wise enough to not be taken for a ride by people around them.
Bottle sterilising and washing clothes -worried about the dust in the room and how the vacuum must be done. Sleep deprived and on my feet and for most days forgetting to eat. Feeling guilty for not eating properly because my baby needs my energy.
Feeling the pressure and listening to endless advice from all sources around me. Constantly feeling slightly guilty if you haven't eaten properly or when we have taken you out- you my perfect baby have slept right through your feed time.
I see you in my dreams and wonder how you do, even if your not in the same room I miss you. Wanting to be more organised and feeling the pressure of running time. You grow with each day and I want to cherish every month. Every smile, sneeze or cat like baby whimper. I want you to be safe and pray for you endlessly. I stress about the smallest things and the biggest. I worry about your future and then feel like have wasted the present.
You have been part of my life just over a month and now I can't remember a life without you. You are my perfect gift from Allah. You are the one I was waiting for. I stress and at the same time enjoy your reliance on me -the complete and utter calm I feel with you in my arms. The way you quieten down when I am near or how you look at me with longing eyes and how your world's safety stems from your parents.
How Thankful I am to my all mighty Allah for this blessing of you. Please my Allah give me the strength , the calm and the rapidness of thought to be able to raise a child that will be a asset to our world and an example of a wonderful human being, kind ,considerate and caring while world wise enough to not be taken for a ride by people around them.
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