The waiting game

Waiting has taken on a new name. Its beginning to take its own shape and form and develop a personality. It has a mood and comes and goes as it pleases. It teases from a far and tempts with tasters.

Singledom has never been a very fair game -especially when marriage is on the cards. I believe we are all destined to meet our other halves. This is not inspired by a bollywood movie even though I am a zealous fan. No-this is based on islamic views. We are all made as pairs and I am waiting to be united with my other half.

Have I miss read the signs and passed them on or have I just not opened the door for them to enter. Have I already said no to someone I should have said yes to or have I become overly picky.
Is wanting the same values and decency you expect from yourself in another person unfair? Is it asking to much or is it prolonging an already difficult decision.

There isn't a lack of men or a lack of women but their is a lack of compatibility. I am astounded by how many single people are out there looking to tie to the knot but they seem to complete ignore the suitable candidates in front of their eyes and rather go looking somewhere else. I can to some extent understand this philosphy in that the mystery and the unknown does have a strangely toxifying persona.

If we're muslim, single , decent , professional and Allah has been kind in blessing us with working limbs and functions why is it so difficult to settle down. This is not a note on frustration or giving up. No this is about the question and wondering "Why".

What is it that keeps us from commiting to those many ppl we meet. Why dont we click and why is it so easy for some. They know who they are marrying before they graduate and for others they continue a prolonged and at times fruitless search.

Rishta settings I thought were meant to make things easier. Instead increasingly I find "Auntys" dont want to commit and introduce people. This is in fear of being blamed for it not working out. Hey whatever happened to its the thought that counts and the intention behind the present or suggestion than the object itself.


Friends coward away from introducing other single people to other single people due to the lack of interest after getting married themselves, having their own families and getting tied up in their own daily lives. I understand this to a large extent but what I dont understand it how you can ask your friends how the search is going -talk about how many wonderfully single people you know and then never introduce any of them to eachother in fear of being blamed for the "it didnt work out".

Marriage is meant to be half our deen but with our careers and our families somewhere it gets placed on the backburner. We age; become wiser and stronger individuals. We get set in our ways but that doesnt mean we arent willing to accommadate and respect differences.

I do believe faith in the divine and Allahs plan is crucial. We must hold dear a pure and honest belief in when the time is right things will fall into place -and while our time isnt now -it is in the future-but its there. ---It is where two people meet -communicate, desire the same things -and if they dont want the same things -they appreciate the diversity and differences of the others opinions and needs.

I end this note(/essay!!) with a question. How many of your single friends have you introduced and why are we constantly shying away from this muslim, humane and social responsibility?